Minimalism As Survival: Timeline

I've been looking more into the "minimalist lifestyle." It isn't to try something new, but become more practical.  Most, but not all of the minimalist bloggers I come across seem to come from backgrounds of excess of some kind and made the "choice" to downgrade. They seem to speak of it as if they found some spiritual enlightenment in their lives.  Maybe they have, but many are smug and proselytizing about it, forgetting that people have and still do live like this.

To be transparent without exposing too much, this is my rough timeline:

• I grew up as an only child, not rich, working class, but spoiled
• Parents were divorced, mom and I shared a room at my aunt's house (this is probably why I'm now extremely territorial) until I was about 14-15
• My life experiences were always "behind" everyone. I grew up with a very controlling mother and a dad with his own issues.  He tried to heal our bond with money and that's what I had come to associate him with when I was younger.
• That left me unable to make most my own choices and unable to take risks up until about 25. It was either mom disapproving or dad not being there as a safety net.
• This comes to the point of the whole blog--My outlet and source of control was acquiring stuff.  When I started working, being able to choose my own clothes was a huge deal. My mother insisted laying out my clothes up until I demanded she didn't do it in when I was about 14-15. She still insisted on picking them out for me with shopping and tried to force choices on me when I was 16.  Aside from a few things, I don't think I fully organized my first outfit until I was about 17.
• About in this window, I bought things that I chose. My mom voiced her disapproval at some things (No, not like a teenager wearing things too short or too tight; she just didn't like it and insisted I wear something she liked better. At that point, I became more vocal w/o fearing repercussion.)
• Now it goes into having my own income, but not much control.  I didn't really learn the importance of saving; with the amount of money I was making at that age and the fact I only needed to take care of one bill (I didn't have a car or a license), I had no excuse not to save. But, I didn't know. It really wasn't ever taught to me, though it was stressed that I make sure I study hard so I can get a good job and a nice house, etc.
• I went off to college at 18 and didn't know how to function finally being away from home. Needless to say, I got kicked out due to grades. Moved back home to my room with my mom and aunt. I found a very good job online, took transfer credits at the local school, and had plans to try for another school.
• This went okay for a bit--but I still didn't save money. I figured it wasn't necessary as long as I still had this flow of income.  Got caught up in an online game and ended up losing the job.
• Did pizza delivery. I was so bad addicted to this online game that I was literally just wanting to make enough to pay for the subscription, and eventually, the expansion packs.  It was seeing another gamer have a breakdown over how much time he put on the game that made me wake up, too. I remember what I wanted to do and went back to school.
• I went for an associates degree and a complimentary BA. Expensive, but it turned out to be a great move in the end. Yes, I'll probably be paying the piper for the next 20something years, but I knew that when I got into it.
• Quit pizza job for better paying work study job, then a caregiving job. Did well in school, got out, etc.  My anxiety disorder that I'd been diagnosed with around 11 or so did get much worse. Due to having no insurance or no money, it was not treated via medication.  I did use the school resources to get counseling help, as well as visit the counselor who helped with my dad's alcoholism, and that did keep me afloat.
• Spent a few months  after grad job hunting. Fought with mother and nearly had a breakdown. Got a job offer the next week--a short term contract--and took it.
• This is kind of where the importance of saving came into play. On my first job, I didn't do the saving thing so well.  Between jobs and doing freelances, I did what I could.  It was frustrating. At the time, I was almost 30, living in a place where jobs in my industry were limited.  At the time, Min.Wage jobs were swamped with applicants so it was hard to even get those to pass the time.  My old caregiving job had dried up too. 
• This part was VERY important for me: A friend suggested supplements to help with my anxiety an depression. They'd gone through the same thing and had been on a lot of medications and swore by this. I tried it and felt like I had a wake-up call. This is likely the biggest contributing factor to helping myself do better, and I'm still thankful for it.
• I took my second job, and this time started saving.  When that contract ended, I had enough money to actually move out of home, the state, even, once I found another gig to secure my income.
• This is where we are now.  Still at the same job, still saving. I make a good income, but a good chunk of it is eaten up by student loans, as I'd already expected.

You will see I enjoy making lists. I promise that future ones will not be that clogged.
When I moved into my first non-shared apartment, I expected to go crazy decorating, buying all the things, etc.  But I realized that buying stuff was my outlet for depression and to soothe my anxiety. Now that that was taken care of through other means, I was largely apathetic about buying anything that I didn't actually need.

The apartment I'm in is large and within my current means. But it's hard to clean.  I chose it because the area is quiet, and it has a W/D hookup.  But now I'm considering later transferring lease in the fall and downgrading to a nice little studio. 

I think growing up made me value privacy over space.  After my friends died in a fire in the 5th grade--they slept with the bedroom door locked, so no one could get to them, my aunt removed all the locks to the bedrooms, except hers.  This meant her and my mother barging in whenever they wanted. I could have been zoned out, studying, or just tired and wanting some me time.  It got to the point where I got intensely angry. I can barely go on a trip with them anymore because of it.  They grew up in a large family, so I think they're used to that sort of thing.

This isn't a move out of survivability. This isn't even a "move" for me.  This is me waking up and realizing that my priorities in life are different from most people's (and I'm sure it overlaps with many) and learning to accept it.  I love traveling, but it's not my end-goal to live out of a suitcase. Though, I wouldn't rule it out if I were ever lucky enough to land a gig that would allow me to do such.

I still feel embarrassed that I'm doing a lot of things now that most of my peers have done in their 20s.  At the same time, I feel like the things I've gone through make me approach them a little more carefully.

Computers are 110% my work. My ideal goal for the year is to save up for a Surface 3 and grab it in January (I don't get things when they first come out for many reasons, including potential bugs). This is on top of paying for the necessities and student loans. I own an old (but very nice) HP laptop I got from the pawn shop for $300 in 2012, an Intuos 3 I bought refurbished for $120 in 2009 or so, and a cheap ($99) smartphone (Lumia 520) on a prepaid service that's good enough for me to do tests on for when I need to see the mobile version of a website or media being made.  Aside from these things and the car, these are all the expensive things I own. Oh, and the pawn shop 42" flatscreen I got for $175. I probably could have trolled for one for free, but this was still practically in the box. I grabbed a Chromecast ($35) and a nice $8 glass table from Salvation Army to use as a TV stand.  Now I have ambiance while I work on my side gigs.

That's the other thing, too. I love what I do and I'm glad I went to school for it.  I love variety in my life, too.  I still freelance and do small projects.  The extra income helps with putting towards my debts, and leaving me with more to save.

Just to give more perspective on this blog:  I don't have kids. I enjoy them, I've babysat them and worked with them all my younger life, but I don't want them.  There really is no deep and scary reason for it, I just don't. I barely date, but the idea of someone moving in with me is dreadful. I would love a cat or a dog someday, but maybe when I'm older, things slow down, and I develop more healthy habits. So, a lot of the things I'll be talking about will be coming from a (happily) solitary person's perspective.